Mother's Day 2010

As I wake this morning, I feel so many emotions.......

I am so thankful for my Mother. Now that I am a Mother it is so different! I appreciate her more now than ever. I think I always appreciated her, but never really knew this much. Looking back she did it all. She was able to stay home with us (thank you Dad for working so hard) and was there for everything! She was a wonderful cook and baked all sorts of goodies. (I think that's where I get a lot of my love for cooking!) She helped us with our homework, cleaned our scrapes and soothed our hearts when they were broken. She taught us right from wrong, hugged us, cleaned up after us, drove us places and made sure we were dressed cute, even when money was tight. She did for us and thought about herself last. Now I know she was trying to teach me to be a good Momma! She continues to do things for us and I have realized...she does these things because she wants to....not because she has to. So thank you Mom. I love you very much and only aspire to be half of what you have become!

Next I am thankful for my baby girl Jillian. I came across this quote and thought it was so true! "The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. The woman existed, but the mother, never. The mother is something absolutely new." Rajneesh~ I really never knew how wonderful it could be. She is such a gift. I have loved watching her grow over the year and she amazes me. I used to tell my Hubby....I just want her to say Momma ,hug and kiss me. She does all those things now and it just melts my heart! I always heard Mothers gush about these things, but it is so different when it happens to you! I look forward to all the changes and already miss the things she used to do! Thank you Jillian for all the joy you bring to my life!

I am also so thankful for my Hubby. He helps out so much and I am truly blessed. Without him there would be no Jillian.....and what kind of world would that be?? The other emotion I have when it comes to my Hubby is sadness. Unfortunately his Mother is no longer with us. I wish I could have met her, I wish she could see the kids, but I do know she is with us every day, watching over us! Also his Sister Patty who is no longer with us. She raised him since he was about 8. I know he misses her too terribly and it breaks my heart!

Lastly, I couldn't forget my Step-kids! They play such an important role of my life too. I can happily say, I am not heavily drinking, yet! Now "yet" is the key word :P I know that I am not a perfect Step-Mom , I am learning as I go. It has been so much fun watching Gwen and Jake grow. They have changed so much since I first met them. We have our squabbles sometimes, but for the most part I think we get along pretty darn good. It is a little scary having 2 teenagers around and I hoped it would help when Jillian is a teenager. Now I am hoping for Alzheimer's by then! Actually I am very blessed. They are very good kids. I also look forward to watching them grow.

~Updates~

OMG! It has been too long! So much has happened! Where do I start!?!?!



Well December 17th I got a call from My Mom at 5:30 am that she was in an accident (on her way to my house to watch Jillian) She hit some black ice and slammed into a stone wall. She declined an ambulance. I woke the kids told them to wait to go to school because Jillian was still sleeping. I got to the accident site and realized she needed to go to the hospital. I called a friend and she came over and let the kids go to school and was there for the baby. We headed to the hospital. When we got there we found out my Mom broke her sternum. Later we found out it was much more than that. To make a long story short...She was in the hospital till the 30th of December. During that time...we found out she brokes ribs, was anemic, dehydrated, her kidneys shut down, had emphysema, was on a high ammount of oxygen and much much more! The first Dr. We weren't thrilled with. She was too focused on my Mom having emphysema. The next Dr. realized My Mom was bleeding internally. Her spleen had split. We were very thankful for the second Dr. He is the reason she was able to come home. My Mom stayed with us for about a month after the accident and my Dad came to help her watch Jillian. Every day she is feeling better and getting stronger. She still has some pain and will for some time. We are just happy she is still around!

40 before I turn 40!

1. Take a cooking class ~Dutch Oven
2. Do a Living Will
3. Lose weight
4. Plant a garden
5. Scrapbook Jillian's (my almost 1 y/o Daughter) first year of life
6. Drink more water
7. Get a passport
8. Take a hot air balloon ride
9. Start exercising regularly
10. Enlarge and frame a Wedding picture
11. Use my Hubby's (DH's= Darling Hubby) Airline passes more frequently
12. Become more organized
13. Have date night with my DH 1 time every 2 weeks
14. Grow my own herbs
15. Learn how to make pot stickers
16. Cook more from scratch ~ no cake mixes, or boxed foods
17. Take a Family trip with my parents
18. Stop cursing in front of my young Daughter
19. Go back on Weight Watcher's
20. Add some color to my walls in my house
21. Be more aware of my posture
22. Utilize the Public Library more
23. Start a Birthday Calendar and send cards
24. See the Grand Canyon
25. Learn to use and be comfortable with a gun
26. Plant a tree
27. Take a day trip with Gwen (my 15 y/o Step-Daughter)
28. Take dancing lessons
29. Set healthy boundaries ~ read Boundaries By Henry Cloud, John Townsend again
30. Do the "Love Dare" with my DH
31. See myself 1/2 as sexy as my DH does
32. Blog again
33. Read more
34. Become debt-free (except my Mortgage)
35. Try not to procrastinate (this one must be really important...had on the list 2 times!)
36. Feel comfortable in my own skin
37. Be the best Mom/Step-Mom I can be (I have a almost 1 y/o daughter, 15 y/o Step- Daughter and a almost 14 y/o Step Son
38. Start making my own cards again
39. Read "Total Money Makeover" again with my DH, listen to his show online and DVD'S
40. Do a budget again